In the past 5 years or so the word "change" has had quite the dose of its own medicine. I myself have been noticing this a lot lately...President Barack Obama used this word as a simple one-word slogan for his campaign in 2008, and slowly began the vicissitude of "change". Those feeling strongly in their political beliefs began despising the word, as if it were offensive, or loving the word without considering its meaning. "Change" no longer just meant the switching of clothing, or painting an object a new color..."change" now represented a movement of national proportions. And, on a personal level "change" began an evolution in its own way.
Growing up I always embraced "change". At a young age "change" was typically positive, Going to a different school meant the possibility of re-uniting with old friends, or mom and dad getting a pool installed was really cool, or finally getting to the age that you could paint your room any color you wanted made you excited and proud...but as I got older and more mature, "change" became more complex...choosing a college wasn't necessarily a fun "change" as it represented a decision that would impact the rest of my life. Getting a job wasn't just something to do after school anymore, but something that would go on a resume for all future employers to see and the skills I would gain from this job suddenly became important...a car went from something sporty and cool, to something that got good gas mileage, and (wait for this one...) could possibly transport MY future family (yeah...let that sink it...I can't)...Grandparents are aging at an alarmingly fast rate, friends are getting engaged, and suddenly hanging out isn't fun anymore, and...and...and....
....and suddenly you find yourself at a pinnacle point in life..."Change" evolved from something new and fun into..."Growing Up" and embracing it suddenly becomes difficult.
The song "Everything Changes" by Lonestar has become hard to play lately. It rings all too true; Tifton has had its fair share of "change" lately, as has my personal life...so I find myself, at 23...preparing to finish my undergraduate...facing different job offers...bracing myself for alarming "changes" with family members and friends...and I am asking myself "Does this get easier?"...Do we ever learn to understand "change" or does it begin to happen at such a fast rate you can't afford to stop and think about it?
I may never know the answers to those questions, but I was reminded of something today... I ran into and old family friend in the grocery store. She knows my grandparents very well, and knows the hardships we are beginning to face with them, and as I told her of how we are preparing for the worst, she looked me dead in the eye and said..."You have to have faith, Randy. Even if it is just an inkling, always remember that all you need is the faith of a mustard seed", and with that I am attempting to turn over more of my challenges to faith, and learn to accept the outcome no matter what it may be. This may not be an easy thing for a control freak like myself, but I am slowly learning that if you try to beat the outcome of every situation you will only drive yourself insane...
...Change is, after all, inevitable.
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